The 'lollipop' one is my favourite...

Stupid euphamisms for m/f sex, before I forget them... for an upcoming chapter of Rollercoaster...

The old in-out-in-out; sailing the milky way; taking a brisk stroll down semolina boulevard; slipping her the old vanilla lollipop; riding the midnight meat train; snacking out of her lady-larder; the ugly tango; feeding the mutant guinea-pig; pitting the snake against the mongoose...

I need more. The sillier and more offensive (without any actual curse words) the better. Suggestions?

EDIT: Worshipping at the velvet temple; planting your scarecrow in the secret barley field