r_scribbles | LOST!!! IN EXPLETIVES!!!

SLIDESHOW! This episode starts with a fricking slideshow, and Hurley is so very Blessfull, as ever!

WAAAAAAAAALLLLLT!!!!!... I mean, MIIIIIIIIIICHEEEEEEEAAAAAAAALLLLLL!!! Nice to see him again. Where's your Boy, Michael? Did They take him right out of your hands? WHERE'S YOUR BOY?!?

ILANA GO KABLOOEY! OK, that was the most hilarious death on Lost ever. EVER! She's been training to protect them all her life and then she goes and does an Arzt? AH HA HA HA HA!!! I mean, I liked her character and all, but dear Lord. Dear. Lord. Well, we should have known. Rough'n'tumble, heat-packing Latina Ladies don't have a terribly long shelf life on Lost Island.

LIBBY! And Hurley's her Constant! As I mentioned before, it seems to be the people who died on the Island who are more aware of the reality-bleed between worlds.

IS THAT WOSSNAME OFF OF X-MEN?!? I do believe it is.

BLACK ROCK GO KABLOOEY!!! Remember how I said Ilana had the funniest death on Lost? She just got surpassed. Black Rock, we hardly knew ye. *Salutes*

HEY GANG, LET'S SPLIT UP, WE'LL CATCH THE MONSTER TWICE AS FAST! - Bah. Three of my favouritest guys have now split from the Super-Special Protected Candidates, leaving me to worry about their safety in the next few weeks. We've had Richard's episode, Ben's episode and Miles reconciled his Daddy Issues last Series, meaning all 3 are, by lost Rules Standards, expendable. I'm afraid for them. Here's hoping they just have fabulous adventures in Dharmaville instead. With Sexy Results!

HOLY CRAP, AN ANSWER! Unfortunately, it was one that we'd already guessed - that the Whispers are from Ghosts stuck on the Island. However, now that it's been made official, I've gone all Geeky trying to remember all the people who've been seen & heard, and who are therefore still around. So far I've got: Boone, Eko, Anna Lucia, some Others fella who was chopping wood, Michael, Jacob, Charlie (although he was only seen off the island, don't know if that counts). Plus a bunch of people who died off-island (Christian, Ricardo's Missus, Ben's Mum, Kate's Dad). Don't know if they were really spirits or Smokey/agents of Smokey... although obviously Ricardo's wife wasn't.)

DING DONG BELL, BROTHAH'S IN THA WELL!!!! No Body = Not Dead. That's what I'm clinging too. Plus the fact that Des was oddly calm about the whole thing. I believe the hot Scot has a Plot. Although he did do a proper Pirate 'AAAARRRRRRGGGGG!!!' on the way down, like Long John Silver, or that Zombie at the end of Buffy. Please let him climb out all creepily on a security video, like Sadako in The Ring, Oh please oh please...

KNOCK KNOCK! WHO'S THERE? DR LINUS! DR LINUS WHO? GTFO OF MY HIGH SCHOOL, YOU PEEDO! - Aahhhh, Dr Linus is so sweet. And so paranoid about Paedophiles! Somebody's been reading too much of the Daily Express!

FREE BONNET RIDE FOR SIDEWAYS LOCKE! Clearly, Desmond has knowledge of both realities. And, clearly, running poor old WheelieLocke over wasn't a case of simple payback, otherwise I imagine he'd have taken the advantage of having the Sideways version of the man who'd shot him and threatened to kill his wife standing meekly at his car window for a couple of minutes. I wonder what his plan with Locke is. It blatantly doesn't involve persuading him to let the pretty, infatuated psychiatric patient kiss him on a picnic. Maybe he hopes Dr Linus will give him the kiss of life, therefore making both men remember about all the scheming, shooting, garroting, etc.

SidewaysLocke: You shot me, then strangled me. I thought we were cool, man!
Dr Linus: I... got you flowers.
SidewaysLocke: you showed me flowers. I brought you eggs, you sunnvabitch!
Dr Linus: I baked you a delicious ham!
SidewaysLocke: THAT WASN'T ME!